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I’ll talk to you soon.” You float up the stairs, collapse on the couch, and POOF, you never hear from him again. In the midst of such rejection, it may be hard to consider what has happened with a cool head. It presents the risk of a “real relationship” with love and risk and emotional openness. Why doesn’t he call and tell you he is an emotional midget and won’t be asking you out anymore? This does not necessarily make them a bad person; it’s just that these men aren’t in the place where love, family, and commitment sound attractive to them. Surely, you say, he wasn’t pretending to be into me. I’m just not into her.” His next thought is a lightening fast calculation with the end goal being – escape with minimal drama. As they say, “Dating isn’t tidily winks.” Dating isn’t being pals. Dating is a process for finding a person with whom you want to have an emotional and sexual relationship.