Another captured my heart (and still holds it, most tenderly).And one remains a trusted friend to this day (and I'm glad).So figuring out when and how to start dating after a divorce can be a real dilemma for a divorced dad.Many dads take a long time to recover before they are ready to date again; and some are ready within a few weeks or months.Be particularly cautious if he's already looking for Spouse #2. Periods of adjustment are to be expected, especially if things heat up.We all need time to heal and don't want to plunge blindly into the rebound relationship. But extreme discomfort, acting out, and outright interference may signal issues just beneath the surface. We would be wise to observe their reactions, heed their reasoned warnings, and consider their hesitation. If you each have children at different stages -- for example, your kids are in elementary school and his are in college -- anticipate some potential problems if you're hoping for a long-term relationship.It can blur your vision when trying to figure out if you want to hang with this person for the long run. I’m Looking for 100% Pure Connection Half my life is behind me. I could see myself eyeing their bodies and trying to imagine the sex, but I stopped myself, pretty quickly, even with the fantasizing. Today, I’m even getting pretty stingy with first dates. I want my next relationship to start out with the potential going the long distance. At our age kids are either a choice you made or one you didn’t. Brutally Honest If it’s not a fit on the first date I’m going to try to let you know as gently and as quickly that it wasn’t a fit. And, in fact, feelings can be scary for both men and women.And nothing against the non-parents in the group, but I’m so wrapped up with my kids, that if you don’t have that same passion and joy, we’re probably going to have to look for things to have engaging conversations about. I think that initial attraction is something that we can’t really control or completely predict, but I also don’t think we can do without it. But as we begin navigating our time together we’ve got to be able to talk about whatever we’re feeling.
For women, pursuing romance after a divorce or break-up presents a slew of unexpected challenges.
-- I would be remiss if I didn't also share some cautions to keep in mind.
In case you're wondering, one divorced dad swept me off my feet (then dropped me over a ledge).
So here goes -- one single mother's set of red flags when it comes to dating divorced men, culled from a very long decade of post-marital dating experience. Do be careful of the divorced man who is only recently out of his marriage.
Unless of course you're looking for a fling (like him), looking to experiment (as is he), or looking to get your heart broken. Do pay attention to what your kids think of him, and what his kids think of you.